i come alive in the fall time.

It's possible that autumn isn't as great as I make it out to be.  Maybe the leaves aren't that beautiful and they are truly just dying and that's that.  Maybe getting excited about making baked goods is silly because you really could make those treats any time of year.  Maybe I don't look as good in sweaters and tights and jeans as I think I do.  Maybe October isn't more special than other months.

But the thing is, I've just emerged from ten years in a place where autumn does not exist.  When the calendar says it's time for a change but the weather does not, you feel frozen in time while everyone else you know is moving forward.

The truth about our move from Arizona to Utah is this: my driving factor in wanting to do this was Theo.  I knew it would be good for him, and already this has proven to be true.  But I also wanted to do this for me.  I wanted to get out of Phoenix, to stop feeling like I was dying in a place I found so unremarkable and miserable.  I knew it would be good for me, too.

It looks and feels like October outside!  Opening the door of a preheated oven is no longer something to dread!  I can read Theo picture books about autumn and the colorful leaves and point outside our windows to show him that his stories are based in reality, not fantasy!

Autumn is better than I make it out to be.  It's even better elsewhere than it is where we live!  But where we live right now is perfect.  It's everything I've been missing.


(Now, here are some dramatic pictures to go along with a dramatic post!)