07 May 2015

"good for you, not for me."

I mentioned not too long ago that I recently read Amy Poehler's memoir, Yes Please.  In it she mentions a motto she lives by, and lately I've been thinking about adopting it until I can come up with one* myself.  The motto is: good for you, not for me.

For most of my life I've lived with "my big fat mouth" syndrome, which more often than not coincides with "foot in mouth" syndrome.  I'm pretty sure of myself when I see some habit/lifestyle/trend that I don't like or intend to take on in my own life.  The trouble comes when I vocalize that to someone (usually Jon) and he'll say something like, "There's nothing wrong with liking that" or "So-and-so-we-know does that" and then I do the proverbial head smack.

Because there isn't anything wrong with people liking whatever they care to like, really.  (Non-psycho interests/hobbies apply here only)  And so at the risk of accidentally insulting someone or having Jon point out to me that there are lots of good people out there who likes things I don't like and that's okay, I'm doing my best to remember that phrase.  Not surprisingly, I have insulted many people without it.

It also gives me peace of mind.  I wish I'd heard something like this more often while Jon and I were dating, but for now it's a great thing to be reminded of while trying to raise a little human being.  People date how they date and get married how they get married.  Parents raise kids how they raise kids, and you and I may not agree on how certain things are done, but who cares?  What's good for you is not good for me, what's good for me is not good for you!  Let's all just worry about our own lives and just be happy.

Easier said than done, of course.  The fact of the matter is I have a tough time being told what to do, or what I should do, and I don't appreciate being given advice when I haven't asked for it.  So if and when that happens in the future, I'm hoping I can conjure up a polite and simple response.

Good for you, not for me.







*I should specify, a more inspiring one.  Because currently I'm a big proponent of the "home is where the pants aren't" motto.

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