29 November 2011

oh my.

so i've had this awful throat thing for almost a week now, and i'm telling you jack, it has been hurting my feelings!

so i decided to go to the student health center on campus today.  and wowee has it changed in the last two and a half years since i went there almost every week my second semester!  anyway, i got in there, sat on that tissue-papered sofa thing, and the nice man said, okay stick out your tongue and say ahhh while i shine my fancy laser flashlight thing in there!  and i thought, well how come i don't get a cool toy, but i did what i was asked to and the nice man utilized his fancy toy and do you know what he said??

oh my.

not like,
lions and tigers and bears, oh my!

more like,
oh my.  that is the most disgusting thing i have ever seen.

and you know how i know that's the kind of oh my he said?  because he followed the oh my up with, those are some really lovely pus pockets you've got there!

when i got home, i summoned up some strength in my stomach and let me tell you... lovely is DEFINITELY NOT the word i would use to describe what is in the back of my throat.  it is slightly difficult to live with myself right now.

anyway, it turns out that my tonsils are quite resilient, and i still managed to fail a strep test.  but i'm being treated for strep anyway because i have very impressive tonsils right now (says the nice man).  i've got some big fancy blue pills to take this week and hopefully i'll be good to go.  if not, i have to go back next week to take a blood test to see if i have mono... awesome.

but chances are, i might not even survive a week.

because the nice man said: now, only bland foods.
and i thought: okay, saltine crackers.
and then the nice man said: and no hard or crunchy foods.
and i thought: well sweet, ice cream!
and then the nice man said: and no milk products, either.

so, that pretty much leaves air.

1 comment:

  1. make a burrito, put it in a blender and then drink it through the straw! i dont see what in the heck else you are supposed to eat.